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An Opinion on Lost Love (dVerse)

I play a scene, at sea in mime,

Alone, notwithstanding your scent,

One breeze coughing yesterday’s dawn,

One quote from a raindrop’s comment.

 

I sense your shadow on stage left,

Cloaked in black, a silence of voice,

The show as I, as I sing eyes

closed to choice, eyes divorced of choice.

 

Close the curtain on love – Broadway,

Unplug dim lights and birth your black,

I walk away as one – no one,

A quote from a tongue, in my back.

 

 

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20 thoughts on “An Opinion on Lost Love (dVerse)

  1. Your background is perplexing, she isn’t hand-cuffed to the keyboard (in bondage to work), or something in the room (like she’s typing to get help), but herself as if her expression is restricted, hmmm, lots to ponder. Then you do so much in a compressed space in your poem. Is it that the actor cannot choose love, or whom to love? The pallid lights indicate perhaps love has already faded; it is dying away before the formal proclamation of its end. I adore ‘A quote from a tongue, in my back’. For some reason Lavinia from Titus Andronicus came to mind perhaps as she lost her love and her ability to express herself (the monsters chopped off her hands and cut out her tongue). Then I think my overactive mind needs to hush and simply enjoy your exquisite poetry :).

  2. hmmm interesting verse…not sure i understand it completely…i really like the last two lines…a tongue in my back, the tongue a sword, our words cut deep…i like…

  3. Very interesting….as a mother of one who is well experienced in lost love and theater it speaks to me of losing the love of writing because money decides what will be onstage. But the love of writing keeps one hitting the keyboard even though they will not be master of the final edit.

    • Thank you, Susie. I love that line, “…not be the master of the final edit.” Sometimes the comments I get are better than my posts. But you are so right on and I feel the pain of loving a love that has to be expressed, that rarely loves back in kind.

  4. a lost love def. can feel like a show that is over…the moment the curtains close and the lights go dim…heavy and well carved emotions in this henry

  5. margaretbednar says:

    I sense your shadow on stage left,

    Cloaked in black, a silence of voice,

    Could be a relationship, or what Susie hinted at above… love the drama in this piece.

  6. Shawna says:

    Oh my, LOVE these lines:

    “One quote from a raindrop’s comment”
    “The show as I, as I sing eyes closed to choice”
    “birth your black”

    A tongue in my back?! Good stuff, Henry. Sounds like the worst and best pain.

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