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Sara’s Advice

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You're still so young, so wet,
Bohemian strung and filled
with songs you haven't sung yet.

Morning sun still shares your journey.
Dew still dampens green canvas shoes.
Mozart is mute on a gurney for two.

Let my verse lay and age on your bare windowsill.
Leave my voice until you hear it, and feel it; not just lust my warmth, or wish my lips.
Come back to me then, and we will talk, drink tea, and quote quips from Bill.

Bring me one flower, from your garden, that's not rose red
or violet blue.
You'll know when you smell it, the perfect scent, of us, in tune.

You're still so young, so wet,
Bohemian strung and filled
with songs
you haven't sung yet.

For dverse Open Mic Tuesday

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19 thoughts on “Sara’s Advice

  1. very cool henry…love the bohemian strung, the songs not sung yet..the Let my verse lay and age on your bare windowsill… and of course the perfect scent of us in tune.. so sensitive and intimate

  2. love the refrain…and the ask to pick the flower, knowing the one with the scent of us when you find it…sweet intimacy there…the second stanza is vividly descriptive…like it much…and your pic above…i have the song stuck in my head now…thanks…smiles.

  3. Laurie Kolp says:

    Mozart is mute on a gurney for two… love how that sounds, Henry. I get what you’re saying. Bill snippets are good.

  4. It sounds great and flows, yet I could do with some notes.
    Bill is obviously not our Old Bill [ the police], or expres. Clinton.
    What am I missing here, and why the gurney?
    Clue me up please Henry.

    • Okay then, notes. Bill would refer to William Shakespeare. This is a photo of my fav lyrical poet Sara Teasdale. I like to write lyrical poetry, but frustrated I cannot grasp the depth of her voice. This poem is imagined encouragement from her to me that some skills need maturing and voices need to be ripened with age and to be patient. And gurney because it rhymes with journey, and to a young lad Mozart is only seen as a dead composer and not what all he represents in art. That’s about it. Thanks for asking. I like knowing readers care to ask. I appreciate your visits.

    • Pictured is Sara Teasdale. I love her lyrical poetry which is what I kind of like to do, but not as good as her. This is like imagined encouragement from her for me to realize some skills come with more maturity and ripening of voice; that I need patience. Thanks for the comment and the visit.

  5. rosemary mint says:

    The opening (and closing) stanza is my favorite, and I also love “Mozart is mute on a gurney for two” and “You’ll know when you smell it, the perfect scent, of us, in tune.”

  6. ‘I have remembered music in the dark,
    The clean swift brightness of a fugue of Bach’s’

    I was just reading Mary Oliver’s A Poetry Handbook where she encourages imitation or adopting style in order to learn. In Art and Fear the authors talk about how we experience the startling work of other artists in a way we cannot experience our own and so there’s a sense that we somehow fall short, though that isn’t true. The experience of expression is fundamentally different than the experience of encounter.

    I love the intimacy, the dialogue you’re engaging in with Sara, I believe through it and other artistic encounters you produce your own great work. I am asleep on my feet today so there’s something else I want to say here but can’t see it, about interaction with other poets so I’ll try to piece it out when I come back (to do with the excerpt of her work above (the connection makes complete sense in my mind but I’m not sure how to communicate it well).

    On a separate note I think humility and a willingness to learn are the mark of great artists. The master’s understanding of the importance of beginner’s mind. Keep that open-mindedness and everything is possible for your own expression. Sorry for the less than cohesive and lengthly comment :).

    • Thank you, Anna. I hope you can get some rest. I appreciate your comments. I believe you captured most of my piece when you said, “The master’s understanding of the importance of a beginners mind.” I’d love to hear your thoughts on interaction when you have the time. I’m off to get some sleep myself. An early night tonight.

  7. Morning sun still shares your journey.
    Dew still dampens green canvas shoes.
    Mozart is mute on a gurney for two
    these just a few of my favorite lines from this write. You have a gifted mind of sight to words.

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