Lust, a stowaway
A candle hid in heart
A model’s lonely gaze
A crossbow’s deadly dart
A lioness roars
in silence of hot hunger
stalking innocent prey
in flames with taste for game
A shame
As the Serengeti burns
As the Serengeti burns
As the Serengeti burns
And mothers hide their young
And the fathers
And the fathers
Well
They run
They run and chase their gaze
And die
The bastards die in harlots arms
As the Serengeti burns
And mothers hide their young
Call me Hanq 
fug dude….bastards they are for not caring enough for the mothers and childern and leaving them to the flames….enchanting way you put this together man….nice repetition…
How sad. I, too, enjoy the repetition. I’ve read it a few times now, and it makes me sadder with every read. Nicely done 🙂
Thank you. I don’t really use repetition, I just studder as I write 🙂
Powerful, like Lori I read it a couple times. It has a fantastic rhythm, could feel the thundering noise and fear. Gave me the shivers.
Shivers for Anna. Another album title. Thanks for the comment.
Haha, nice.
THIS…is pretty much how I felt earlier today. Bring the change…as you say (and made me smile when I thought no one could!) I hear your music here, Henry. Wicked smart rhyme and word play…as there always is…perhaps it the back drop of color and horns that teases me out of the corner of my eye…but I’m ready to start the hunt and get some payback!
A Tashtoo comment! Happy about the smile. Thanks for the comment. Get the payback, girl. Payback Girl, hmmmm, like the sound of that.
Excellent. So I take it the fathers are making babies with the harlots, thus the title.
These are my favorites:
“Lust, a stowaway”
“A lioness roars
in silence of hot hunger
stalking innocent prey
in flames with taste for game”
“And mothers hide their young
And the fathers
And the fathers
Well”
The repetition is very effective. I always enjoy your work, Henry.
Or a circle of bastards, def not a Disney song:) Thanks for comment.
A circle of bastards indeed. Lion King is a great movie. Not so sure about this version. 😉
really well done… such a sad subject. the form makes it extra powerful.
The cycle never ends, eh? I love the first line. “Lust, a stowaway” – three words that nearly say it all.
That was my fav line too. Thanks.
This rings of the truthful myopic point of view we often carry as the larger community is in need of greater attention. lovely write ~ Rose
Hey Henry
a very dynamic piece that really delivers
Imagine action. a real revolver by the bouncing beasts
and roaming beats and bleaching suns . . .
Great craft Henry
an excellent out loud read
fresh and fiery
Great write. The repetition adds weight to your words.
Your verse comes in staccato bursts, very effective! It conveys the urgency and despair. Yes how awful the fathers reacted. Great write Henry!
Hank
I daresay, Henry, you’ve hit on an unfortunate historic truth. The mothers tend to hearth and home and family. The fathers do… what the fathers do.
Power-packed…the repetition drives it home.
oh heck..intense verse…the burning and seeing what happens under pressure..tight..
Hiding, hiding — after news of the girl shot in Pakistan, I feel the fear.
I think that’s how it is – primal – lion like – on the prowl – leaving the young to the females, and when nature threatens, all that’s left is to run, run away and try to leave the fires behind you. Perhaps it’s in the DNA, but absence threatens the pride, and makes the fires more likely. Well considered and written.
maybe comparing the wildness of the Serengeti to our modern world….how the savagery of nature is present in every environment…..this poem was share and had bite for sure…and a real rhythm that I liked a lot
Refrain, repetition, used most effectively; resounding, musical, excellent poetry…